Yesterday I was in the biggest funk. I haven't been this sad/emotional/depressed in a long time. I have been on this emotional roller coaster the past six months and I am sure that if you know me, you know what I mean. One day I enjoy being single, the next I hate it. I was looking forward all last week to seeing the UK boys, and we did, just not mine. Don't get me wrong, Gracies was SO fun like always, until 2am when drama happened and I was just sad that I never saw "Robin Thicke". All yesterday my serious thoughts were....I'm not cute, I'm not skinny, no one likes me, I'm not funny. And those words kept repeating themselves over and over. I really don't know why I got to that point. Maybe I'm sick of men who just want one thing or maybe I'm just missing my UK fling. I at least wanted to say bye but I know I'll get over it. They left to go back to the UK on Saturday.
Saturday morning, I got home at 4am. That same day I saw a picture of Robin Thicke on Facebook (who he looks like) and then today I forgot I had Robin Thickes playlist on Pandora. What does this mean?
Being human means you will have off days. Unfortunately my off day was one day out of my weekend but it's been a chaotic last few weeks.
Today I woke up in a much better place and in a much better, happier, normal Abbie, mood. My book is officially published and I am so in love with it! I feel so accomplished and so happy but still not complete. It'll get there. I am down 4lbs, I went and worked out today, went to Target, last night I went on a walk and watched the Jazz game and decided to take it easy since I was feeling so sad and depressed. I am so grateful for friends and family that I talked to yesterday that helped me try and get over this mountain. I'm gonna try not to go out to clubs or Gracies as much because of the emotions that I go through afterwards. I love guys and I do love being single. I just hate emotions that come with that. This upcoming Friday will be the Utah Grizzlies hockey playoff game and then Saturday I will be seeing (and most likely meeting) Ryan Cabrera! And yes, I have been planning my weekends weeks ahead. It's more fun that way :) And I hate sitting at home (although during the week it's easier for me to do that because I work all day) so I like knowing that I'll be going out.
At Gracie's Friday night we actually met and talked to three NBA refs! That was pretty cool because we all know how much I love the NBA. If I drank, my drink would have been paid for by one of them but since I stuck with water, it was free :) After the craziness that has gone on the last few weeks, I def wanted a drink.
It's always complicated when you're single and always confusing. I never know who I'll meet or what I'll do but I do like the fact that I can choose and not stick with one person for now :) We all have off days but in the end, I wouldn't have it any other way. I am happy to be me and I am grateful for my talents and no one can ever take that away.
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