Showing posts from 2014

New Year's Resolutions + Other Randoms

I have always been a big fan of New Year's Resolutions. It doesn't mean I have always accomplished everything but it does give me something to strive for. In 2014, I did not hit ANY of my goals. So I'm being more realistic this year. Goal's are made to be realistic anyways, right?

Here were my 2014 goals: $5,000 in Savings Get Engaged Publish my Book Run a 5K Be at 125lbs Start a business Get a raise Get off Zoloft
Here are my 2015 goals: Publish my Book Finish and complete a second book (Not necessarily publish) Lose 20 pounds by May (Hawaii!) Exercise 2-3X per week Be cautious of my gambling habits (Set limits) Find out what happiness is
My book is currently in the Design stage which takes about 1-2 weeks to complete. I have also started working on another book. You can click HERE to read more about my second book. You can also click HERE to "like" my first book's Facebook page.
Every other blog, or every other few weeks, I am over Kevin and than not c…

Christmas Holiday - Why am I alone?

The holidays are supposed to be full of happiness and excitement. I have come to the conclusion that I am 82% happy. I am not me. I am not my old self. I miss what was my other half. I miss what was love. I miss what was. I have to stop lying to myself. I miss Kevin. I would never get back with him but I have been thinking about him SO much lately. It's actually pretty ridiculous. I had several dreams about him. One being that he brushed off the fact that he had a girlfriend and wanted to get back with me. He haunts me. I try and move on and there he is. We had a mutual friend on Facebook and I HAD to delete him because I responded to something he said, and right above me was Kevin's comment.

I do enjoy being single. Sometimes. Sometimes, like now, I just want to call someone. I want to tell someone all about my day. I want to snuggle. But I can't. It's just different. And I understand that I need to move on but I think I tried to move on too quickly. I am meant to be …

Living Single and Enjoying Single

Two months ago I never thought I would be at this point.
I am back to my normal self and I am starting to enjoy things.
I go on dates, take care of myself, relax, and bowl every Sunday.
The past two weeks have been AMAZING. Like really beyond amazing.

A week and a half ago to celebrate my birthday, Sister Amanda, KC, and the three girls went to Vegas and California with me. I did not realize how much I needed my California family. Nana and Amanda took it upon themselves to have a birthday celebration for me at my favorite pizza place - Klondike's! Then back home for cake and ice cream. I have never felt more love than that night. And to have Morgan there too was great. He is an amazing person.

Last week was my birthday week and I celebrated by getting a massage, shopping, and going to the Jazz game with Jason. I could not have asked for a better birthday. And being single did not stop me from having a great time. Believe it or not, Kevin did text me on my birthday. I didn't fe…

The Adventures of Dating - Part 1

I can say that after eight weeks and four days, I am officially okay with dating and officially okay with being single. Although I do wish for a magic genie  (or God, either one)  to just provide me with my husband and I don't have to go through dating but such is life. There is one thing I do not understand. I have been told over and over that if I don't like somebody or if I don't see it going anywhere, tell them I'm not interested in the nicest way possible. I don't like telling people I'm not interested because I feel that that in itself is mean. But, I have had to do it twice and both times, I was called an "asshole" and the other said, "F*** you." It's like, if I'm honest (and not even rude), I get in trouble. But then if I don't tell them, then I'm "leading them on" which eventually leads to the same ending.

So with the latter one, I was messaging him on Facebook today. Let me reword that. He messaged me ove…

Seven Weeks Post Break-Up

It's been exactly seven weeks since Kevin broke up with me. I thought things would get easier and for awhile they were. But man. I went three weeks without crying and then out of NOWHERE I cry. Why? I miss his nieces and nephews lol. I literally cried for hours. I miss little Brookey Babe, Easty Babe, Huddy Buddy, and Cars. So I did let him know. Honestly, I don't care about his relationship. But I did message him and let him know that I missed his family. And he responded back and said he missed my nieces too. And my whole family. I have been thinking the last few days about him. I go out on a date to La Costa or Texas Roadhouse and all I think about is how he used to sit next to me....never across from each other. As I wear my Utah Utes hoodie, I miss going to games with him. Instead, I am sitting at home by myself watching the game. It really isn't fair but I know there is someone out there for me. Someone that I can build memories with. To be honest, when I dated Alber…

What is love Part 2

I will never see Kevin again.
I had his hoodie and left it on my porch tonight. I told myself (and God when I prayed) if he came over and knocked or asked if he could come in (he knew I was home) then I knew he cared about me and there was a possibility there was another chance for "us" to work out. If he didn't, he doesn't care. Although I knew I didn't want to see him because it would be even harder to move on and I didn't want to cry and I didn't want to cry and have him walk away like he did the night he broke up with me, part of me still wanted me to see him.

But I'm okay with this. This is what is best for me. I have learned a few things since we have broken up. Especially with what I want in a husband. I want someone that shares my passion with sports. I love watching football (I'm watching the Broncos game now!) and basketball and love going to games. How can I marry someone who just doesn't? I also love social media and that's wha…

What is love?

I have been dwelling on writing about my past relationship for awhile now. But I feel like now is the perfect time. It's been almost a month since Kevin broke up with me and my heart was broken to pieces. I could honestly say that he was my life. He was my love and he was all I knew for almost three years. He made me laugh and smile like nobody in the past could. He made me happier than anyone and anything and I was so happy with him. And now it's gone. I have not had my heart broken to pieces this much until now. I have never felt so alone. I have never felt so hurt. I have never felt so betrayed. Two nights ago he told me he was dating someone else and a few hours ago I looked at his Facebook page and there she was. What a jerk. But yet I still cling to him. I still want him to hold me. I still want him to snuggle me. I picture him walking up the stairs and saying, "Hi" to me as he comes over. And now it's like I don't exist. I fee alone. I feel sad. I feel…

Contests and Giveaways- Are they worth it?

In January 2014, I started doing giveaways and sweepstakes through Facebook. I decided that I would discuss what it's all about and if it's worth the time. Sometimes I will spend hours on end just entering contests and giveaways. There are certain pages on Facebook that offer giveaways or sweepstakes and they do require liking the page, liking another social network, commenting on a post, liking a post, subscribing on YouTube, etc. Some are more extensive than others. I have to say that doing this has been 100% worth it. I have won countless prizes and even have birthday present and Christmas presents tucked away.

Below is a list of SOME of the stuff I have won or received.

Park City hotel stay in Luxury Suite
$100 JC Penney gift card
$100 Paypal cash
$50 Red Rock Brewery gift card
Two ItWorks skinny wraps
Seacret Scrub
Seacret sample skin care regimen pack
Countless headbands and beanies for my nieces
Oil samples
Shampoo and conditioner samples
$100 Tanger Outlet Gift Card