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Showing posts from June, 2015

I'm Numb

I was hoping for a drama-free weekend and, for the most part, it was. Starting Saturday. I was looking through a friend's Facebook page just now and saw my ex, Kevin, with his girl that he started dating two weeks after him and I broke up. She had a ring on so I went to his page. He got married a month and a half ago. I'm happy for him and I don't like him like that anymore BUT it's just so weird to me. We had to date almost three years for him to say he didn't know if he wanted to marry me....and then they get engaged and married within a nine month time span. Or less. I guess when you know, you know.

No one told me. I'm not sure if it's because they didn't want to (I would probably be sad if I found out through someone) or if because they thought I was still friends with him on Facebook. I haven't been friends with him, and honestly didn't care much about his life the last six months or so. But wow. I'm seriously numb and in shock. As if m…

I thought I was a Failure Until I Realized......

I'm just human. I have flaws. I try to keep my house clean but it isn't always clean. Same with my car. I don't take a lot of time to get ready in the morning but I still try to look, feel, and smell good. I sometimes speak my mind or say things I don't mean. But I'm only human.

I fully understand now why people wait so long to get into a relationship. Or even a new relationship. I understand why time is so important. Two break-ups in less than a year is something I do not ever want to face again. I honestly am at the point where I don't trust anyone enough to date them. I literally told my cousin tonight I wanted to buy a one way ticket to California with no intention of coming back home. The reasoning was so that I wouldn't have to face life. Or face reality. Basically live a dream with no money and not sure where life would take me. A few hours later and I'm stepping back. Realizing that, yes, I do want to move, I do want to start over, I do want a n…